Lunch break at work today and I have no idea what to eat for lunch. So I asked myself what the best thing I ever ate was? It seemed easy enough, until I realized I have no ready answer. I closed my eyes and reached far back into my memories, willing something — anything — to rise to the surface. I made a deal with myself, the first one I remember most probably is the best, or at the very least, one of the best.

All of a sudden, I am a kid again, finding myself stepping into Ta Eve's kitchen, being nourished with a meal cooked with lots of love.... pochero!!! Oh. Sweet. Heaven. It was always perfect. It was chunks of beef shanks — bone marrow in, fat, meat, litid (tendon) gently boiled for hours until the meat is so tender it just falls off the bone if you so much as nudge it with your fork. It sits serenely, in individual soup bowls, like a king in clear broth so tasty (and somewhat greasy), needing little else than plain white rice (admittedly and decadently, heaps of it.)

Ta Eve's pochero would make you want to save every bit of your appetite to savor every last bite of it. It is sublime and simple, the way this dish has been made. There is no great manner upon which it must be enjoyed to the hilt either; in fact, it seems all so natural and ordinary. The basic rules of enjoying good soup apply — you sip the broth steaming hot just right. You “ooh” and “aah” and smile at the sheer pleasure of a good meal that is, in your heart blessing the cook and whoever came up with such perfection. Nothing like a comforting bowl of soup... this was a HOME RUN!

Then you reach that point when you know you must already start enjoying it with and on rice, so you spoon some more of the broth over the grains (adding a dash of Kikkoman), taking some meat that's just FALLING OFF the bone, pushing that beautiful, perfect spoonful past your lips and into your mouth. Simply put, the Ta Eve's pochero was like this bad boy every young girl is told to stay away from but can’t. 

It was, hands down, the best thing I ever ate. “Heartwarming” isn’t the first word that comes to mind when you talk about Ta Eve's pochero. However, a meal like this shared with family really is all that’s needed for a heartwarming meal.

To this day, we still do Pochero Sundays, however enjoying it with a less wanton than I used to. See, the reality is that I should not be mindlessly eating copious amounts of bone marrow and fat as often as I want to. These are special treats, to be had only once in a while. Only teenagers can afford to do that.

Thankfully the original recipe was handed down from generation to generation and we are still able to maintain the taste (and smell) that brings back a lot of wonderful memories. I am glad we are able to do that. Some things change, but really, some things are so good they just have to stay the same.

Me (The Doormat)... Not!

Just recently, a friend (supposedly) had everything in his life (work, family, love…) gone wrong (read: feeling like a two-by-four hitting him on the head). And since I'm a pretty good counselor, I tolerated him calling me at all hours in the night (and even when I'm at work), even me missing work just so he could vent out his anger and frustrations (translate: whine, moan and bitch) over his work and family. He probably looked upon me as a comfort, a reassuring constant that remains in this tumultuous, chaotic whirl of loss--and renewal. But now that everything seems fine, he's nowhere to be found. The least the creep could have done was send some flowers or something -- a note, email, text message, instant message… but no, nothing, nada! And there were "unmentionable" things he did too!

OK! So I tried to help, but he screwed me over! I should learn from it. I've got to wake up and smell the coffee here. When a pal does something hurtful to you, it can feel like your heart's been chewed up and spit out onto the pavement. It's tough when someone you thought was your friend pulls a fast one on you. Betrayal can launch you into an emotional tailspin. Your thoughts might range from, "Why would someone who supposedly cares about me do something so mean?" to "How dare he!" Of course, most of the time, it'll be big of you to (gulp!) forgive.

Recovering from any kind of betrayal is never easy. No matter what the issue once was, forgiveness is always a difficult -- but real -- part of friendships. Many people think that they must just let go of the past to move on. Along with causing grief and trepidation, that approach limits personal growth. Rather than hate a period of our life, the person we "used to be" or people we've met along the way, learn to find the way each experience helped us become strong. When we take this approach our entire life opens up and we begin to build bridges naturally. Then, each person we meet -- whether we like them or not -- becomes another bridge, a new way to deepen the love and understanding we become capable of.

But, then again, there are those rare instances when it's OK to say "See ya!" and times, when the friend's offense is more severe, it's definitely better -- even wiser -- to forget the so-called friendship. I was a doormat for too long- and I'm done being one!